"I'm married" said my mom.
I didn't know how to respond to such short but powerful sentence. Afterall, I don't get this very often, not from my mother at least. And you gotta admit telling someone you're married is not the best way to start a conversation; however, it's different this time.
My mother and I haven't had a nice conversation for years. Ever since I left home, we have our seperate lives - I've been working my ass off to undo the damages she has caused me while she's persuing her new life in Hong Kong, the city she loves the most, the place she has the best and the worst memories.
Hong Kong is such a special place to my mom not just because she's from there. It's also the place she met her first love and had her heart broken into pieces. And who's that lying basterd who broke her heart? That'd be my father. It was a typical "country girl meets rich bachelor" story. And like most movie plots, the rich guy married another rich girl, and the poor country girl ended up pregnant.
A lot of people called my mom stupid. Well, she didn't make the smartest decisions in her love life. But honestly speaking, relationship is more complicated than making the right choice; no matter how smart you are in life, you can still get hurt.
In my 24 years of memory, my mother was never trully happy. When I was a kid, I just thought we had too many problems that we had to deal with, as she always said - life sucks. Life has sucked for her because she was always hopelessly waiting for something, like my dad's call, my dad's promises to come true, my dad's comforting lies, my dad's annual visit. One time, I caught her sitting on the floor in the kitchen crying. I never realized how hopeless and lonely she must feel.
After 20 years of waiting, she finally realized my dad's lies she believed in were not going to happen. The relationship between her and my father was officially a failure. It might sound like my dad was a lying asshole and a cheating basterd. He was. But the failure of their relationship was no one's fault. It's just unfortunate my mom fell in love with a person who's incapable of love. I don't think my father knows what love is. From what I know about him, he doesn't know how to love anyone but himself. Or maybe he does, but he loves only himself. Regardless of what the real strory lies behind this mess, my mom hasn't been loved the way she deserved, not until now.
"I'm married, finally. I'm really happy. I'm loved. Are you happy for me?" she sounded genuinly happy for the first time. "Yes, I'm trully happy for you" I responded. Everybody deserves to be loved, so do I. But how many of us actually get what we deserve. So I am really glad she has found her happiness she deserves after all these years.
I am happy she is genuinly happy at last. I hope one day I will be too.
Starbucks, Weyburn, CA
I didn't know how to respond to such short but powerful sentence. Afterall, I don't get this very often, not from my mother at least. And you gotta admit telling someone you're married is not the best way to start a conversation; however, it's different this time.
My mother and I haven't had a nice conversation for years. Ever since I left home, we have our seperate lives - I've been working my ass off to undo the damages she has caused me while she's persuing her new life in Hong Kong, the city she loves the most, the place she has the best and the worst memories.
Hong Kong is such a special place to my mom not just because she's from there. It's also the place she met her first love and had her heart broken into pieces. And who's that lying basterd who broke her heart? That'd be my father. It was a typical "country girl meets rich bachelor" story. And like most movie plots, the rich guy married another rich girl, and the poor country girl ended up pregnant.
A lot of people called my mom stupid. Well, she didn't make the smartest decisions in her love life. But honestly speaking, relationship is more complicated than making the right choice; no matter how smart you are in life, you can still get hurt.
In my 24 years of memory, my mother was never trully happy. When I was a kid, I just thought we had too many problems that we had to deal with, as she always said - life sucks. Life has sucked for her because she was always hopelessly waiting for something, like my dad's call, my dad's promises to come true, my dad's comforting lies, my dad's annual visit. One time, I caught her sitting on the floor in the kitchen crying. I never realized how hopeless and lonely she must feel.
After 20 years of waiting, she finally realized my dad's lies she believed in were not going to happen. The relationship between her and my father was officially a failure. It might sound like my dad was a lying asshole and a cheating basterd. He was. But the failure of their relationship was no one's fault. It's just unfortunate my mom fell in love with a person who's incapable of love. I don't think my father knows what love is. From what I know about him, he doesn't know how to love anyone but himself. Or maybe he does, but he loves only himself. Regardless of what the real strory lies behind this mess, my mom hasn't been loved the way she deserved, not until now.
"I'm married, finally. I'm really happy. I'm loved. Are you happy for me?" she sounded genuinly happy for the first time. "Yes, I'm trully happy for you" I responded. Everybody deserves to be loved, so do I. But how many of us actually get what we deserve. So I am really glad she has found her happiness she deserves after all these years.
I am happy she is genuinly happy at last. I hope one day I will be too.
Starbucks, Weyburn, CA
1 comment:
If you let your happiness become dependable that'll be an ever-searching quest. Every person should be capable of being happy just by himself/herself.
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